freewriting 1/1

My boss is leaving for more than a week, and we have events and deadlines so closely scheduled to each other that we're finding ourselves a little more harassed than normal. 
I would show you my to-do list but I'm lazy to take a picture, plus the lighting isn't so good here in the bedroom. 
My to-do listsss (plus notes) are five pages long.
It's daunting. But at the same time I feel thrilled to be given so much to do. Like, hey, people trust me to do this thing, and that's an awesome challenge to have.
~
Lara and I had a looong discussion several days ago, something about having crushes or checking out other people while in a relationship. In particular, checking out people that fit in your "boyfriend/girlfriend material" standard.
I think that's fine, it's normal, and there's nothing to feel threatened about if your partner isn't acting on their attraction. But the thought that one could still categorize people into "relationship material" didn't sit well with her, as if someone was making a mental note who they could date just in case the current boo became an ex.
I'm like, "So what?"
Am I being idealistic here, to the point of being naive? Dense, even? Am I trying so hard to be open minded and accommodating that people begin to question my morals? Hahaha. It's just a little crush~~
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Kevin bought a portable sewing machine last weekend, and I tagged along. His was so shiny and new, and it sewed so smoothly... I felt sad for my yellowed hand-me-down and thought about buying my own.
My grade school years flashed before my eyes. Those first day highs, new supplies, new and pretty stuff made you want to use them because you wanted to flaunt them.
I knew the equipment and materials weren't the one with problems. Superficial people like me are the problem.
My vintage machine works like a pro trained through the years, and I'm the idiot who doesn't make the most out of that baby.
~
I'm 15lbs heavier than I was this time last year.
Not really an issue 'cause I have bewbies (!!!), but man is it so much more expensive to buy a whole wardrobe that fits my new body than to lose weight.
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I'm still coasting.
I don't want to hit 25 and feel like I did when I was 21/22. Those years I think I already had my quarter-life crisis. I would want to be over that by the time I actually hit my quarter life, thank you very much.
~
This post is because I am taking a break from writing...by writing. My article was due yesterday. Or was it the other day?

Fort Santiago

Manila is such a pain to go to from where I live (which is near enough, to be honest). I'd need to transfer from jeep to train to another train to jeep again, and there would always be some rough action going on with commuters like me. The walking I can bear as long as I have my trusty pink sneakers on and music blasting in my ears.

Today I made sure I had both when I went to Philippine STAR to purchase back issues for work. I thought it would be a waste of fare money to go straight home afterwards, so I got myself lost in Intramuros for a little while.
The sky was at first was threatening some rain, but luckily I enjoyed such a lovely weather while in Fort Santiago (a good two-minute walk from the STAR's office).
This is a headless priest, the stuff that nightmares are made of but you can stick your face in for a photo. (I wouldn't want to be there after sundown.) 
When light hits Pasig River's big waves, I'm reminded of black velvet. Odd considering its such a luxurious material, I know, but an observation I find rather fascinating. 
Detritus here smells like fermenting chicos from a tree nearby...and wet socks.
I'm always filled with wonder looking at old places. What did it use to look like, how did they decorate this place, where would the people mingle, who died here are just a few of the questions that come into my head.
I took a different route going home. I learned there were jeepneys headed to SM North(!!!) from Fort Santiago and the traffic along the way was so bad. I was sitting all the while anyway, which was so much better than being squished and exchanging aromas with all the population on the train, at rush hour on a Friday night. Plus I had my phone charged for a mere P5.00 at the Mini Stop across, so my ears were happy. And I had some reading material too, courtesy of my newly purchased old newspaper.

An attempt to make posterity my thing again

I haven't been writing in a long while. Except for my inane captions on Instagram and several bursts of emotion on Twitter, there haven't been enough words coming out of me lately. I've been vomiting them online since high school and for much longer offline when the coolest thing you could do with a computer was WordArt. Now writing hardly ever comes so easy because, frankly, I'm lazy. It's more convenient to take photos.

Besides, one is equivalent to a thousand words anyway.........


But my ramblings, no matter how much they don't make sense to many, are my way of sorting my thoughts through. Just like at the end of the day when I clean up my bag (okay, sometimes I don't), I would blog about mundane things I did for posterity, to filter emotions, to vent, to "see" my thought process in words because I'm a visual person. After that my head's rid of stuff I don't need or stuff my brain can't contain anymore kasi 16GB lang yata capacity 'teh so it must be put somewhere I could remember for later.

Plus I've been stressed/forgetful/dim lately, and I blame all this to my lack of practice in writing. Writing makes me think in a more organized, calmer way and that shows in how I behave, and do things.

So! Please accept this post as my attempt to write properly again. And to make posterity my thing again (to entertain the grandkids with, if I ever have any). K thx.

I'm sharing a photo of me and Kevin earlier at the studio looking silly because I haven't smiled that way in almost a month; this type of good shit needs to be immortalized on the Internet.

Good night.